It’s real, I’ve met all of Obama’s dads and they really do call him the cigarette crab. I don’t think he’s ever been to Japan and I don’t understand why the owner called him Mr President though because he’s never been president.

his powers allow him to collect dads like pokémon

Some people got polycules of parents (which I have decided to call parentcules I’m just going to be butchering the English language so buckle up y’all) I mean we got the grampolycule over here